Order Only Private Message to Sirius Black and Remus Lupin

Look, I'm just going to put this here. Who knows whether Ellie will give us a chance to talk about it, and I suppose you want to send off your owl tomorrow morning first thing.

These questions aren't half impossible, you know, but I know that's how she feels about it all--as if there are no answers to be had.

And she asks the hardest one first, doesn't she?

But do you really think we can change anything without using violence?

I do think there are things we can change or at least things we can do without violence, but I don't know at all that we'll be able to change everything that needs changing. I do doubt that's possible.

She's twisted things up about the unforgivables, hasn't she?

I think dead is dead, and it doesn't matter all that much whether you kill someone with Avada Kedavra or with a blasting curse to the midsection or with a knife to the heart.

That's coming at it backside front. Is that the way they're teaching them to think about murder? Yes, there are lots of ways your enemy might end up dead, but Avada Kedavra has only that one outcome and it only works if you absolutely mean it to. The difference is wanting to protect yourself and wanting to kill--wanting to disarm or, well, harm.

I know I come to this from a different place than most do, but I've seen it used. And I never could. It takes-

It takes bloodlust to be able to cast it. The killing curse. I really think it does. And I know it causes it, too. I mean, after a person casts it, they look more bloodthirsty than before.

And there's no taking it back. If you use the killing curse, there's no chance of bringing the person to trial. Or of correcting a mistake, if you were wrong in thinking they were guilty. I know she's talking about Bellatrix Lestrange and the Carrows, but what are the chances that she'll end up opposite anyone like that? It could happen--well, not with Carrows now, thank Merlin--but it's more likely to be someone she doesn't know enough about to make that judgement. That's part of it: you act the wizengamot, don't you, if you kill someone outright? I don't want to make that decision because who am I to say whether death is the right sentence? And even if it is, who am I to say they shouldn't make restitution or be made to tell all they've done or reveal important information before they're put to death? And there's no chance of any of that if I kill them in a duel or a battle. Let alone an ambush.

They didn't give my mother a chance. They could have arrested her and put her on trial, but they didn't. They killed her where she stood. And that was horrible. It was evil. You should have seen his face when he cast it. And after-

I may want revenge, but that doesn't mean I want to do to them what they did to her. That would make me just like the wizard who killed her. Mulciber.
 
 
 
 
 
I'm sorry. I know she asked more questions, but that's all I can write for now. Not sure it's what you wanted even. I don't think it would make much sense to her, would it?

I'm sorry.